Infants express their needs through crying and seeking physical closeness, the infant learns through patterns with caregivers, such as if the caregiver maintains proximity, if the caregiver is attentive, and if the caregiver can meet their needs. These factors contribute to developing an attachment style, which can be either secure or insecure. According to both psychologists and child development specialists, attachment patterns from childhood can impact our interactions with others as adults. Individuals who have secure attachments can be supportive in relationships with others and typically trust that others will also be supportive. Individuals with insecure attachments may have problems with trusting others, being vulnerable, and can engage in negative interpersonal patterns. It is important to note that, insecure attachment styles can be changed via life experiences, growth, development, and healthy social connections. Throughout life we grow and develop, we mature and experience changes in actions, opinions, and our belief systems. As we change, sometimes our support system and friendships change, which could impact our social wellness.
I think it is important to highlight that personal growth and development are individual choices, therefore, we can only be responsible for our own personal growth and development. As much as we may love our children, friends, partners, coworkers, etc., we cannot force their desire to grow and develop. Given that many individuals have a variety of attachment styles, some may require more support with being able to prepare themselves for growth and development. Individuals with insecure attachment styles and maladaptive personality traits, will have to develop the level of insight to recognize their challenges and then need to develop the desire for growth. Those with maladaptive personality traits, can struggle to have healthy friendships, romantic relationships, or successful working relationships with peers in employment settings.
It seems like stories involving “fake friends” “toxic friends” “toxic workplaces” “toxic bosses” and “narcissistic” partners are common. Some people argue that competition and jealousy are normal among certain social settings such as work or among friendships. Whether or not it is normal can be debated; however, I do not believe the behavior is healthy or even safe depending on the situation. Despite what we would like to believe, we cannot predict the actions of others, despite how well we may think we know a person or situation. We also can never state how well we know a person or situation, because people can hide their intentions from others. “Toxic workplaces” can be demoralizing and impact both your mental and physical wellness. “Toxic friendships” and “narcissistic” partners can cause stress, anxiety, depression, and trauma symptoms. Rising above those situations can be challenging and emotionally difficult, but they can also force you to grow and develop. Those experiences can allow us to learn what we what from relationships with others and work environments. The growth we experience from those situations can prepare us for the next chapters in our lives and allow us to be more prepared and successful when faced with similar situations. I encourage you to constantly seek opportunities for personal growth and development. Seek out opportunities to diversify your social connections, to allow yourself to grow and develop from connections with people who have different experiences, backgrounds, and beliefs. Diverse social connections can also provide you with the ability to leave an “toxic workplace” or pivot your career into the direction needed. I want to share some books available on Amazon that can assist with personal development.
The Shift: Poetry for a New Perspective, by Melody Godfred has poems to guide you with personal growth, through openness to different perspectives. More information about this book can be found via this link https://amzn.to/3Pil4Qr.
The Happiness Journal: 52 Weeks of Guided Reflections to Cultivate Genuine Joy (A Year of Reflections Journal), by Sophia Godkin has guided weekly reflections to support growth, happiness, and positivity. More information about this book can be found via this link https://amzn.to/3iUMz6N.
Working with Difficult People, Second Revised Edition: Handling the Ten Types of Problem People Without Losing Your Mind by Amy Cooper Hakim and Muriel Solomon has methods to navigate difficult personalities in the workplace. More information about this book can be found via this link https://amzn.to/3VLnKJ5.
Wishing you health and happiness
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My Mind, My Body, My Journey™ 